Who Is Thomas Riso?

This game came to me while thinking about the quotations I put at the top of my page, which no one looks at or comments on. "What if these don't express what you want them to, Tom?" I thought to myself. "What if everyone thinks you'd be better represented by, `You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch,' for example?" So, to clear up any doubt, I've decided to make a game of it, and let all of you help decide who I am. Below is a growing list of quotations and references to other works that I am suggesting represent me to a greater or lesser degree. Your job, should you choose to accept it, is to choose those which you think best represent me, and let me know what you think. If you can think of any other quotes, music, pictures, etc., that you think represent me, feel free to tell me. This list will always be growing, and you will get extra points for picking items which make it onto the list, as well as full credit for the suggestion. You also get extra points if you can identify the source of the quotations, etc.

Speaking of sources, I am currently limiting myself to Other People's Works, which are Other People's Intellectual Property. I make no claim of ownership, and proper attribution will be made on a Legal Page I am currently working on. This page, when finished, could also be used to UNFAIRLY identify sources, thereby getting extra points. Such use, as will be explained on the Legal Page, is strictly prohibited.

And, unlike the previous game, I am planning to have a REAL, LIVE PRIZE for the winner, probably related to the quote that best represents me. Something like a trip to Firenza, or a broken record. I don't know. It depends on the winning entry. But there will be a real prize, so enter early, enter often.

Who Is Thomas Riso?

List of September 15, 2000

- [Tom], how much stuff do you need to be happy?
- I don't know. How much stuff is there?
Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita,
Mi ritrovai per una selva oscura,
Ché la diritta via era smarrita.
I don't know, I was really drunk at the time.
Some are vicious, some are fools
And others blind
To see in me one of their kind.
In the end, there can be only one!
You, not I, are the indifferent killers of the poet's dreams.
Ciaccona, Partita D min. á Violino Solo senza Baßo
David
Jack Butler's gonna like you.
Regardez le ciel. Demandez-vous: le mouton oui ou non a-t-il mangé la fleur? Et vous verrez comme tout change ...
Now there is no one around who wants to hear his new sound
That he hoped would shoot him back to fame.
Now he's dying inside as well as dying outside,
A talent that has turned to shame.
Who am I and where did all these kids come from?
That was our first reader submission, courtesy of Kim Falconer!
That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for Mankind.
E = mc²
OK, I am already disappointed with the non-literary references. I may have to put multimedia links there for numbers 7 and 8.

Well, we have already given out extra points to someone, so you'd better get your own votes in. This game will continue until I get bored, so don't wait!
List of September 16, 2000
Yeah, well, it's part of a, uhh, a trilogy, really, a musical trilogy that I'm doing... in D... minor... which I always find is really the sadest of all keys.
Thank you. If you appreciate the tuning so much, I hope you'll enjoy the playing more.
The dancer who relies upon the doubtful comforts of human love will never be a great dancer.
- Perchè non ci crede più.
- Perchè non sa voler bene.
- Perchè non è vero che una donna possa cambiar un uomo.
- Perchè non sa voler bene.
- E perchè, sopra tutto, non voglio di cantare un'altra storia bugiarda.
- Perchè non sa voler bene.
Tommy, lad, you?.... You should na' be too surprised. I told you, if you love someone deeply enough, anythin' is possible. Even, miracles?

Wow! Are you all having as much fun as I am? Oh, that reminds me.

Wow, this is fun! God, this is much better than playing drums!
Well I'm sitting around trying to write a letter.
I'm wracking my brains trying to think
of another word for horse
I ask my brain for some assistance.
And he says: Huh...Let's see...how about cow?
That's close.
OM
No page in history, baby,
that I don't need.
I just want to make some ear drums bleed!
Oh, wait! That's someone else! ;-)

Speaking of Mindy, we have some very clever readers. Mindy looked through the rest of the website and found several very appropriate quotes. Unfortunately, some of them cannot be put in the list because they break the rules I've arbitrarily setup (and, no, Mindy, I didn't just make them up. They were part of my initial concept, even if I didn't explicitly mention them). I've decided to only have one quote per source (this rule will be broken eventually, and Mindy will get credit for two more items). And I decided not to include any of my own work (this rule is likely to be more resilient, but may get broken as well). But that does leave the following (and, Mindy, you can get more extra points if you can tell me where it comes from).

Don't you wish you were me? I know I do.

(I wonder if I should disqualify Mindy for hurting my feelings by choosing number 11 as representing me. My former music partner calling me "a talent that has turned to shame." Hmmmph!)

This game is so dynamic and so popular, in only its second day on the Web, it has spawned... Another Game! Yes, I've decided that this is really Two, Two, Two Games In One. There is the original game, described above, where the point is to describe me, with extra points awarded for knowing where I stole the material. The Exciting New Game has as its goal to track down as many of the sources as you can, with extra points awarded for correctly identifying which describe me best. That way, the many people who wander here by accident, who have no idea who I am, have a chance to win, too. I tell you, the Internet just doesn't get any better than this!

I was thinking I might keep score online by marking how many votes each item gets as an apt description of me. That way, even people who don't know me could at least get an idea of how my friends see me. What do you all think?

I must say, this page, in only its second day on the Internet, has become one of the most profound and entertaining sites on the entire Web.

OK. Before I go to bed, I have one obvious item to add. Then, Good Night!

http://members.nbci.com/TARiso/game-whoistom.html

List of September 18, 2000

That's not fair! Mindy's making me break all my own rules. But, I'm afraid, her latest suggestion is too good not to put on the list, so here it is.

So, did you guys buy that 01/W for my birthday yet?

More to come. And the rest of you had better enter soon, before Mindy runs away with the prize. Hey, didn't she win "What's In Traci's Garden", too?

List of September 25, 2000

Well, no one is playing this game, since no one ever looks at this site, anyway, so I will end it all soon. But, just for the void....

As you can see, we've had our eye on you for some time now, Mr. [Riso]. It seems that you've been living two lives. In one life you're Thomas A. [Riso], program writer for a respectable software company. You have a Social Security number, you pay your taxes, and you... help your landlady carry out her garbage. The other life is lived in computers, where you go by the hacker alias Neo, and you are guilty of virtually every computer crime we have a law for. One of these lives has a future, and one of them does not.
The novel begins in a railway station, a locamotive huffs, steam from a piston covers the opening of the chapter, a cloud of smoke hides part of the first paragraph. In the odor of the station there is a passing whiff of station café odor. There is someone looking through the befogged glass, he opens the glass door of the bar, everything is misty, inside, too, as if seen by nearsighted eyes, or eyes irritated by coal dust. The pages of the book are clouded like the windows of an old train, the cloud of smoke rests on the sentences. It is a rainy evening; the man enters the bar; he unbuttons his damp overcoat; a cloud of steam enfolds him; a whistle dies away along tracks that are glistening with rain, as far as the eye can see.
Mindy gets half an extra point for that one.

Well, I'm breaking all my rules now, and I apologize for resorting to a <gasp!> translation (the avoidance of which was another unwritten rule).

What are you waiting for? You're faster than this. Don't think you are. Know you are.
To my darling [Traci], without whom I should never have known the support and peace of mind essential to this work and - who knows the price of sharing her husband with that other Mistress, the Violin
I've always been mad, I know I've been mad.... Why should you have to explain why you are mad?
    PER ME SI VA NE LA CITTÀ DOLENTE,
PER ME SI VA NE L'ETTERNO DOLORE,
PER ME SI VA TRA LA PERDUTA GENTE.
    GIUSTIZIA MOSSE IL MIO ALTO FATTORE;
FACEMI LA DIVINA PODESTATE,
LA SOMMA SAPÏENZA E 'L PRIMO AMORE.
    DINANZI A ME NON FUOR COSE CREATE
SE NON ETTERNE, E IO ETTERNO DURO.
LASCIATE ONGE SPERANZA, VOI CH'INTRATE.
There once lived a Man in a Castle
And a strange man was he.
Paradise
Is exactly like
Where you are right now
Only much much
Better.
Yes, what is it, you Moon-faced assassin of joy!?

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